8th Day Christmas novena "Look for your star"

 MARY

I'm going to be honest, being a mother so soon was not in my plans, let alone being a mother in that way...because I would most likely be a single mother with all that implies. At times I felt ashamed... yes, it seems strange... but I was ashamed to wear the word made flesh (maybe you have felt the same way when you have said that you are a follower of my son).

It was all very particular, as much as it may seem now, the Angel was more of a scare than a joy... the scare he gave me... Buf! I was convinced that it was too big for me, and at some point I was thinking NO, and even after all that I thought it must have been something in my imagination. Living together as a family was so normal... that at some point I thought that it had been a dream, that nothing was real.

The first years were very hard, we moved several times... and well, what can I tell you about the hardness of the end... But if I am completely honest and taking stock... IT WAS WORTH IT, or as my son used to say, I was very FORTUNATE.

When I analyse nowadays I have to say that sometimes I wrinkle my brow a little saying... but... what do they think they are doing? My son, yes, he was God, but I was a normal person, a day-to-day person, going to the market, talking to my neighbours, helping my family at home...

I had the problems and the life of someone like you. It is true that I gave a YES that was not easy, but I am sure that you also have similar moments... hold on to them, to those difficult moments in which your answer was a YES. Don't be afraid... surrender and above all be faithful to your heart, fear is the tool to grow, any decision taken that does not involve a risk, in which we are not afraid... are usually easy and empty choices.

It is scary to go against the current, to go for the message, to become a Brother, to ask yourself what God is asking of me, to believe that God expects a lot from me because the one to whom God gave the talents has the obligation and the responsibility to put them at the service of God. I am Mary and I said yes even though I was afraid and unsure... and who are you?

How do you overcome your difficulties in discerning your vocation?